Caroline's Special Need

I haven't shared this on my blog for the sake of protecting Caroline, but I made up my mind that maybe I could help someone else if I did share. Most people that are close to me know that to China Caroline is considered special needs. She was on the special needs list. We knew that the little girl we were going to adopt would have a special need of some sort, but we did not know what at the time. When we saw Caroline's file we immediately fell in love with her, we knew she was the one. Now came the hard part, to open up the file and read her medical report. To read what little information was provided to us. There it was the word lymphangioma. Lymphangiomas are malformations of the lymphatic system. These malformations can occur at any age and may involve any part of the body, but 90% occur in children less than 2 years of age and involve the head and neck. It was a foreign term to us so I began searching and searching for answers. I knew she was ours in my heart, but I was reading some pretty scary stuff. I gave her file to a pediatrician who gave us the worst and best case scenario. In the report we knew that Caroline had a benign tumor removed from her neck, but there was one left in her chest that was very close to her heart. I prayed, I cried, I read, I talked with my closest of friends and family, I stayed awake at night. What in the world did this mean for us? What did it mean for this little girl? Was she the one even though she had this special need...a special need we knew nothing about? A special need that scared us to death. We had three days to say yes or no to this little girl. A little girl that had captured my heart. Sometime during those three days we found peace. Peace that we could handle whatever came our way, peace that we could provide the best medical care possible for her, peace that she was ours!! So with that we said, "yes"!

Deep down I was scared to death. Deep down I'm still scared to death. I'm scared because the time is finally here. We are taking Caroline to Cincinnati for a MRI on Monday. The MRI should let us know what the next step is for her medical care. This is a trip I have been nervous about since I first saw the word lymphangioma. I have faith in the doctors there. Faith that they will do what is best for her. Do I regret saying yes to our Caroline? Absolutely not!! She is smart, sassy, strong willed and she is my girl. Is she special needs? I'll let you make up your mind once you meet her. Please say a special prayer for Caroline and the doctors as we go through tests Monday and Tuesday.